Hello Thanks for writing to us with your health query. What you have is called vaginismus. IT is a psychological disorder where women fear vaginal penetration. The hymen is a flimsy delicate tissue. Breaking / rupture of the hymen does not cause any pain, only slight spotting sometimes. For this condition , you have to visit a gynecologist. A hymen does not need to be cut . With gentle finger dilatation, the doctor will explain to you how vaginal penetration can be done. Anesthesia is usually not required, except in very severe cases, if you just do not understand / co operate. Please seek medical attention before this condition affects your married life. Take care.