Hi and welcome to Healthcare Magic. Thanks for your question...
I understand what you are going through. It must be very difficult to face these stressors one after the other. But please remember that this is just a passing phase in life and if you seek professional help and stay positive, you will soon be able to overcome these difficulties. I'm not sure what mental illness you've been suffering from, but there are a lot of good treatment options available.
You need to seek immediate help for your depressive feelings and suicidal thoughts. So, please consult a psychiatrist
at the earliest. With medication and counselling
you will be able to come out of this phase. Also, please keep talking to someone close (a relative or a friend) about your difficulties and feelings. It will help you offload some of your burden at least. Most importantly, please remember that though your future seems very dark and meaningless now, all these feelings will pass away with time and remember, you have a great life ahead. So, once again, please consult a psychiatrist urgently for help.
Wish you all the best.
- Dr. Jonas Sundarakumar