Hi there jku. I understand your issues & empathise. How long have you been married? Are there any specific stressors in your lives currently? How old is your wife? Does she have any medical issue like hypothyroidism or diabetes mellitus? Interest in sex between two partners has to be created & nurtured . More often than not, one partner will have less interest than the other. You guys will have to work around it. How long has this India-Dxb distance been on? Perhaps it is time you either took her there or came down yourself...talk to her..it may help break the ice & sort things out. There is no problem indulging in oral sex with your spouse but Oral sex is an acquired taste much like vegetarianism to quote a friend ;-) Go easy on her & be gentle..perhaps you can meet each other half-way. You may want to consider the use of additional implements or stimuli like X-rated films to help get her in the mood or set the tone by taking her out to her favourite restaurant or indulging her in some chocolate or delicacy that she particularly enjoys ;-) prior to indulging in the act itself. A good option is to go together to a marriage/sex counsellor or a psychologist to help you get an objective opinion in person from a qualified expert that may help set the tone. Often we listen to an outsider. If in the Bangalore region, please do drop into Vikram Hospital & between a couple of specialists, we could help sort out your issues! Do hope this answer has given you pointers in the right direction & will help both of you enjoy your married & sex life! Best Regds. Dr Praveen Rodrigues MD