Thank you very much Dr.Tina Jacob Das.

Its so kind of you to have sent me a reply. Though to a part of what you have mentioned was told to us by his school pediatric psychiatrist, on her advice we have taken to another doctor for complete check up. His conclusion was that the boy has no problem, but needs little extra time than a normal child to cope with things. Now what do we do? we are faced with the same problem once again since the school says the boy is much better than the last year, but needs much more improvement to cope with the lessons and the added burden of coming academic years.

We are so confused as to what course of action we should take. His birth was cesarean section. My sister-in law is 10 years younger than my brother and my brother though a good guy, but have absolutely no good as a human being. He is very cruel and wont hesitate to hurt anyone if it suits him fine. I have seen him deliberately hurting many of us. Including my mom and dad. His way of hurting was not physical but mental. We were all so scared of him we just drifted off him long ago. He was an acute alcoholic and had suffered a heart attack ( he never admitted to that but said he had a gastric attack) and was childless for all-most ten to 13 years i think. Then added to this my mother's indifferent treatment to this girl resulted in a big gap between all of us and her. I was the only one who was her side all that time. He use to abuse her physically also. She is not a good looking girl, not even attractive very simple village girl type. Have sufficient education to teach basics to her children. My mom and my brother both are ridden with false prestige and wrong notions about the religion (we are Brahmans) this should tell you what a hypocrite they are. They went to the extremes.

Finally they resorted to have her go through artificial insemination and she conceived after 3 attempts, and it happen to he twins , they let it go fearing if they try to do anything the whole pregnancy to be terminated. She was asked to be at hand near the hospital for regular checkups. We are in Bangalore and the hospital she went for checkup in chennai. So my mom and my brother arranged for her parents who are not poor but comparatively in a much much lower position where money is concerned. Funded them and ordered them to look after her. So, naturally my mom and my brother had a upper hand on them and tortured them just like slaves. They could not go anywhere leaving this girl though her elder sister lived close at hand. One such time also came when she was entering into her 8 th month, her parents had to leave town for one night for some urgent work. My brother and mom came to know by spying on them and had a huge fight over phone and made this girls life as miserable as possible. Finally he told her she is as good as dead to him and he will perform the last rights for her and her two children. This closed all the doors for her and her B.P. Shot up. The doctor's were so worried they had to perform an urgent operation and removed the children. they were just bones covered with skin. We were sure they would not survive. Both the children were kept in incubator for almost 3 months i think, i do not remember, and she fought with all her might and brought those two kids back to life. The problematic kid had some eye problem because of the rays and had underdeveloped lungs resulting in him having breathing problem, and often falling very sick (it still continues.) Even now he can not run fast or play like other children, he will start breathing heavily and sit down. My heart goes out for this kid, I know there is something drastically wrong with this kid but i am so helpless and scared, because i am not trained medical person, if i do something and it turns out to be worse for the kid, i can not even imagine. What do i do?


My brother does not drink but the remains the same. He always treats his wife as good for nothing, and screaming and shouting and physical onslaught continues in front of the kids also. The second twin who is having problem now is very attached to his mother. She uses him as her outlet most of the time. Though this guy is less demanding and always does things on his own. The other twin who is alright is replica of his father and demands things to be handed over to him even if he could just stretch his hand and pick it up.

The kids have gone through a tough time but they are very fond of each other and take care of each other. You have asked if the child has gone through any abnormality during birth time, the whole thing is abnormal what shall i say? please give me a solution for this problem, i am devastated and longing to do something for this kid. He is extremely bright child, he chooses colors as i he is a trained painter and his drawings are so meaningful and soulful. He speaks English with such accent as if he is a foreigner. His speed in talking results in mixing up of all words making it difficult for us to understand what he is trying to say. It shows there is some amount of disorientation in his thinking and expressing. My mom and brother will never accept that they are the cause for this kid to be like this. Even now there is a vast discrimination in treating both the kinds by my mom.

Please Doctor, kindly let me know what i could do to help the kid. Awaiting your answer.

Regards

Vijaya