Recently I ve been having issues and to me it seems that no one is really acknowledging my struggles. I wish I had never been diagnosed with asperges, I feel that it has basically ruined everything. ASD is a life long developmental disability yet I feel like it s been treated as if it needs curing. Whatever issue I have, it is always linked back to asperges, I understand that people have to make these links but I really can t comprehend how me seeing ghosts and demons are part of that. The two people from the cit team just said that it s me being quirky because I m on the autistic spectrum and I think that is ridiculous. I know I am odd, but seeing things like that everyday is certainly not part of asperges syndrome. I am not qualified in mental health but I do know a fair amount as I ve been interested in it for years so I ve done plenty of research. My issues of late include - ghosts, which I have called shadow people. There are dark ones which are tall and short white ones, I believe the dark ones to be demons trying to take me back to hell with them and the white ones are trying to protect me. This happens almost everyday, I don t see them constantly and they aren t very clear but they are 100% real. I have felt them push me and scram me. The tv and my laptop, I keep getting feelings that I m being watched. I have now resorted to covering my laptop webcam so hackers from another country can t see me and broadcast me in public to ridicule me. Also the tv sometimes worries me, like when something comes on the news about a certain subject I feel guilty because I think they re talking to me. Like whenever there s been a crime and they are talking about it I keep thinking what if I did that, or when it s talking about this generation and about obesity I feel as if they can see me and they re aiming it at me. I also believe that I have some sort of psychic power, I don t know when this came about but I do know its been a while. My mam agrees with me too, she knows that I can sense when someone is going to die, and I mostly can tell what someone is going to look like before I meet them, for example- the lady who did the ados, I knew she would have shoulder length hair and I even knew she d wear a purple shirt. My eyes, this is a whole different matter but my eyes feel as if they have bugs behind them pushing outwards. I thought I was allergic to something but I ve had a course of antihistamines and it hasn’t done anything. I keep lashing out, I don t know why but just everything annoys me. I can t concentrate on anything and my thoughts are kind of going to fast for my body to regulate. I m not a happy person, I haven t been ok for three ish years. My suicidal thoughts are taking over and I just think that life isn t worth living. Everything is so pointless, we wait to be born, wait to go to school, wait to finish college, wait to get a job, wait to retire and wait to die. And what for? I feel as if we are all connected to a string, these strings are connected to everything you ll ever come in contact with. So basically it sets out your life routine and we all just obliviously follow it along. I think these are set out by the dark shadow people, and because they think I m one of them I m not attached to a string. This means that no one is set out to come into contact with me, no one has to reach in and actually act as if I m there. I feel as if I m this supernatural entity who got lost in a world that is full of chaos. My psychiatrist said that it s all down to anxiety. But I know 0000% that it s something more. I m anxious because I m seeing demons coming after me, I m not seeing demons because I m anxious. I really really need help but no one seems to be taking any notice. These episode type things happen a few times a day, and while I m in that frame of mind I really think all of that what I said is true, but then once it s over I realise how stupid I was being. I don t have a clue what s wrong with me but I know it s something. I feel as if my minds going to explode. What should I do?