Hi,
Thanks for choosing HCM,
you seem very depressed, everyone has a past...good or bad you need to go on with your life
find out the purpose of your life
its good you are trying to forget your past life sad incidents
why do you think you are wrong all the time
acc to me you are wrong only when you think low of yourself and lack self confidence

what you are doing is good,dream big....be serious in fulfilling your wishes
you said you are not starting to acheive your dreams...remember dear small steps make a big journey
the problem behind you not starting to acheive is you have no clarity in what you want to do and how

i will try to help you with it ...
try these tips
1.put on paper what all are your dreams ,
2.divide them as big ,average and small
3.divide them into other kind also , a.practically possible(reality) b.imaginations
4.take a big goal ,devise smaller steps to reach a goal and start working on it seriously
5.work about your goal daily ,however small thing you may do ,do it daily

let me explain
example:you want to cook for your self
dream about what you want to cook,how tasty you want it to be
now get your ingredients one by one veggies,onions ,oil,etc
check for facilities you got like a stove or electric cooker
plan and learn how to cook
practice well
cook it
you can do it

this is a small example i want to give,dont think otherwise because you have not mentioned your gender age etc i have comeout with this

so leave about cooking try to understand what i want to say
start now

think positive
you dont need any outsiders help to lead your life happily
alwaya be confident
you have a purpose of your life ,
go ahead

coming to your physical health ,it is quite common to get ill,and thats not your mistake
no one can command you or illtreat you just because you have a health problem
if you still have doubts go get a complete health scan done,take medication for your health problems,
be health conscious take good diet

mental health is equally important dear........

stay cool,relax,feel comfortable to live your life king size
involve yourself in various activities
do sternous exersice,it throws out all the bad stuff from your mind as well as your body
try meditation
perrform yoga it brings you confidence

never try to hurt or harm yourself!! your family loves you,they need you the most

realize yourself,leave all imaginations behind ,come out into reality

read some inspirational books,watch such movies

dont waste time,you have a lot to acheive

if your situation gets worse and seem like your depression is dominating you,go meet your doctor ,family doctor is sufficient to give you counselling

but all this helps only when you seriously want to do something great in life and wiiling to be confident and happy in your life

hope i answered your queries
feel free to contact me for further queries

thank you