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Suggest Treatment For Persistent Anxiety And Depression

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Posted on Thu, 28 Jan 2016
Question: For a long time I have felt anger and resentment towards my mother- at a very pivotal moment in my life she pressured me to make important decisions about my future - steps that I was not ready to take at the time- by taking these steps I found myself in very difficult circumstances- and now she wants to a continue a friendship w me - although I have a lot of anger towards her- in other times she has also been mean & hurtful & tried to pressure me into important decisions in my life - and when I resisted- she tried to hurt me on an emotional level- now she wants to pretend she's my benefactor & my friend- she calls me often & expects me to continue a relationship w her- I have a lot of resentment & hate & anger towards her- we have never spoken directly about my feelings..
doctor
Answered by Dr. Shubham Mehta (8 hours later)
Brief Answer:
Maintain a suitable distance with your mother.

Detailed Answer:
Hello
Welcome to HCM.
I can understand your concerns.

Your mother has been hurting you very often, pressurizing you to take decisions according to her, emotionally hurting you.

You have also suffered from Anxiety since long.

I think this unsupportive family environment is the major cause of your Anxiety and panic attacks now.

I would suggest you to maintain a suitable distance with your mother. Take your own decisions and do what you think is right.
If she has been hurting you emotionally in past, she might do it again.

Communicate with her only if absolutely necessary.
Repeated emotional traumas will further increase your anxiety.

Hope this helps you to take right decision.
Feel free to ask further.
Thanks.
Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
doctor
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Follow up: Dr. Shubham Mehta (11 hours later)
The problem now is that I feel that my parents expect me & want me to change my life & relocate to their town to help them now that they are getting older- according to XXXXXXX tradition. I am very afraid to be in proximity to them - I feel they will hurt me, manipulate me, deceive me like they did in the past. Nevertheless I also have string feelings of guilt if I am not there for them and something bad happens to them. What should I do doctor?
doctor
Answered by Dr. Shubham Mehta (18 hours later)
Brief Answer:
Talk to them clearly.

Detailed Answer:
Hi again.
Sorry for the late response.

If you are apprehensive that they will hurt you again, you must clearly talk to them.

Talk to them about your fears, how you feel about them. Tell them that you want to take care of them (as they grow old) but at the same time, you have your own life as well.

You can not be ditched again and again. Talk to them clearly.
If they understand this, you can stay with them and fulfill your responsibility. But do not get too much involved emotionally with them.

If they again sound manipulative or dominant, its better for you to maintain distance from them.

Hope this helps.
All the best.
Take care.
Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
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Answered by
Dr.
Dr. Shubham Mehta

Psychiatrist

Practicing since :2008

Answered : 2145 Questions

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Suggest Treatment For Persistent Anxiety And Depression

Brief Answer: Maintain a suitable distance with your mother. Detailed Answer: Hello Welcome to HCM. I can understand your concerns. Your mother has been hurting you very often, pressurizing you to take decisions according to her, emotionally hurting you. You have also suffered from Anxiety since long. I think this unsupportive family environment is the major cause of your Anxiety and panic attacks now. I would suggest you to maintain a suitable distance with your mother. Take your own decisions and do what you think is right. If she has been hurting you emotionally in past, she might do it again. Communicate with her only if absolutely necessary. Repeated emotional traumas will further increase your anxiety. Hope this helps you to take right decision. Feel free to ask further. Thanks.