Brief Answer:
Likely due to her tightness of vagina, it can be treated

Detailed Answer:
Hello XXXXXXX

Congratulations for marriage.I can understand your concern.
Many newly married couple face problem in sex life initially.

When female becomes sexually active,initially due to anxiety and fear of pain during sex, subconsciously she tries to resist penetration by tightening of her vaginal muscles. It is called vaginismus.

For penis, constant erection only feasible when there is continuous feeling of excitement and romance in mind.Due to vaginismus you fail to enter in vagina and your mind diverted to discomfort of penetration. This is normal phenomenon. There is no problem related erection in this case.

Treatment is usually counseling regarding sex to relive anxiety and Kegel exercise.
You should discuss this problem with your wife and make her relax.
If she has any doubt regarding this problem,ask her and let me know.
If she agrees you both can go to psychiatrist/gynecologist to clear your doubts, counseling and relieve anxiety.

For your help I am explaining exercise part from one website.

Women with vaginismus can do exercises, in the privacy of their own home, to learn to control and relax the muscles around the vagina.

The approach is called progressive desensitization, and the idea is to get comfortable with insertion.

First, do Kegel exercises by squeezing the same muscles you use to stop the flow of urine when urinating:

Squeeze the muscles.
Hold for 2 seconds.
Relax the muscles.

Do about 20 Kegels at a time. You can do them as many times a day as you want to.

After a few days, insert one finger, up to about the first knuckle joint, inside the vagina while doing the exercises. It's a good idea to clip your fingernails first and use a lubricating jelly. Or do the exercises in a bathtub, where water is a natural lubricant.

Start with one finger and work your way up to three. You'll feel the vagina's muscles contracting around your finger, and you can always take your finger out if you're not comfortable.

Hope you find this answer helpful, I will be happy to help further.

Regards,
Dr.Chintan Solanki.

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Brief Answer:
That wall is hymen, you need to break it,give more time in foreplay

Detailed Answer:
Hi,
Thanks for follow up.

Your sex position is fine. It doesn't matter with your problem.

In virgin woman there is a membrane(wall) that surrounds or partially covers the external vaginal opening.It is called hymen. It may be lacerated by disease, injury, medical examination, masturbation or even physical exercise in some females while in many it remains intact until it is broken by intercourse.

Your wife may get pain if you try to break it with your erect penis and she is not ready for penetration with relax mind and sufficient lubrication.Many females do not feel any pain as they enjoy the process of sex. Initially 2-3 successful intercourse break the hymen completely and later on no pain will be there and you can insert penis deep in to vagina easily.

If you wife is apprehensive about the same, this may be the cause of her vaginismus.
You can do following things.
-Explain her about the requirement of breaking hymen.
-Use condom initially if feasible.
-Apply lignocain jelly 2% in her vagina which serves two purposes: reduce pain as well as lubrication
-She can take routine over the counter pain killer medicine before 2 hours of intercourse like diclofenac to reduce severity of pain.
-Spend more time in foreplay to make her relax,arouse and ready for penetration,when she feels ready she herself should invite you to enter/penetrate
-You should enjoy and continue efforts to insert penis in vagina gently without being conscious about your erection or pain of your wife.Gradually increase the force if you find much resistant.In this way you can succeed.
-When one successful attempt is there. second time it will be easy to enter with less discomfort and third time almost without any discomfort.After that no need of any medicine

In conclusion you both should be relax and enjoy the process of foreplay and intercourse to succeed for the same.

Hope I have answered your query, I will be glad to help further

All the best.

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Brief Answer:
Initially these things are normal, keep trying you will succees

Detailed Answer:
Hello,

Thanks for another question.

There is coordination timing problem.Initially couple face such type of problems.

When she aroused on her own,you just try to enjoy romance and foreplay,do not actively think that your penis is getting erect or not.This may hamper the process of erection.

Another option is when she aroused,make your penis erect with masturbation with hand(yourself or make her to do so). During this also do not think about erection,try to enjoy excitement and arousal.This process makes erection fast.And after sufficient erection try to penetrate.

If even after 3 months frequent attempts(say thrice a weak) you do not get a successful attempt, go to psychiatrist/sexologist with your wife for evaluation and treatment.

Hope I have answered your query. If still any query there, I will be happy to answer.
If not, you can close the discussion and if feasible give your feedback so I can improve service. In future you can contact me directly if you wish with this link: http://bit.ly/drchintansolanki

Regards,
Dr.Chintan Solanki.

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