How get rid of alcohol addiction?
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Hi, my husband drinks every week. he is 30yrs old. seems lik he had been drinkin for more than 8yrs now he says he has reduced the amount these days. he is a sweet person and behaves good until topic of boozin comes up as discussion. he would want to drink on a random day in a week.when I say no to drink or argue its bad,he starts to defend himself sayin, am depriving him from his basic harmless desire. he gets angry and hypertense. am expecting a baby in marchbut am very depressed with his behaviour. will this affect my kid? please suggest me a way to handle him. its very stressful to see him booze every week.
Posted Sat, 28 Dec 2013 in Drug Abuse
Answered by Dr. Preeti Parakh 35 minutes later
Brief Answer: As below. Detailed Answer: Hi XXXXXXX Welcome back! It is really difficult to see one's loved ones harming themselves and not do anything about it. But unfortunately, this is what I am going to advise you to do at present. For the time being, do not argue with him or ask him to stop drinking. You are in the last few months of your pregnancy and it is a very stressful time for you. Concentrate on your own health for now. Since your husband is very sensitive to your criticism of his drinking habit, I think this issue has become a kind of power struggle between you and your arguments make it imperative for him to drink to show his independence. Try a different strategy now. Rather than complaining about his drinking, praise him often for reducing his alcohol intake in response to your wishes. Tell him how you know that it is a sign of his love for you and for the baby that he has cut down on drinking. Plan some outing or other activity for the every evening so that he is not free to go out and drink. Often people drink because there is nothing else to do. Keep his schedule packed with activities that he enjoys to ensure that there is no time to drink. The best thing would be to ask him to accompany you on a walk every evening so that you get the exercise that you need and he is there to take care of you. You can even ask your obstetrician to suggest this to your husband. Above all, stop worrying as it adversely affects your baby. Enjoy your pregnancy. I am sure things will work out to be fine as it appears to me that your husband cares a lot for you. Best wishes. Dr Preeti Parakh MD Psychiatry
Follow-up: How get rid of alcohol addiction? 59 minutes later
Hi doctor, many thanks for your reply, I will try to implement your advise. he is good to me til he plans to booze. every week somehow he finds a reason or a friend to accompany him. engagin him or diverting him becomes out of choice since he dismisses all other commitments for that plan. he even tries to avoid me or stay out for the night for implementing his plans. he doesn't miss me. I feel ignored. atleast now I need his attention but he prefers to booze and stay out of home. to him am not interesting nor spendin time with me is a priority. I work in a early mornin shift,he works for a evening shift. only time we meet is at night and he calls sleepin next to me as spending time with me. we both hav come to a point where we both regret marriage. at times I get suicidal thoughts since I lost interest in living. I dono how to handle my emotions
Answered by Dr. Preeti Parakh 1 hour later
Brief Answer: As below. Detailed Answer: Hi XXXXXXX Pregnancy is very stressful and the hormonal changes also contribute to making one very emotional. As long as your husband is drinking just one day a week, do not worry much. The situation is not out of control and you can afford to ignore it till you are strong enough to deal with it. Just take care of your own health and let him drink once a week if it keeps harmony in the home. I hope once the baby comes, both of you will come closer and he will realize his responsibility towards the baby. Many men find it difficult to deal with impending fatherhood. They also find it difficult to accept the change in their wives' bodies and the resultant effects on their sexual relationship. It is possible that your husband is going through some such emotional turmoil and feels that he is going to end up losing his usual way of life when he becomes a father. His gestures of leaving you alone to drink may be his way of trying to hold on to his carefree life which he knows is going to change soon. Talk to him regarding what he feels about fatherhood and reassure him. Ignore his behavior for the time being and make the most of your pregnancy. Try to enjoy this period as much as you can. The less you expect from him, the less you will get hurt. There is a lot to life other than marriage. Do not let marital stress take over your life. Once the baby comes, you both will have an opportunity to rebuild your relationship. Take care. Best wishes. Dr Preeti Parakh MD Psychiatry