Get your Health question answered in 3 easy steps
A Doctor will be with you shortly
Ask a Doctor Now
121 Doctors are Online

Unable to ejaculate, feeling frustrated. Stressed and tired. How to make him relax?

My boyfriend has been under a lot of stress , long work hours, tired etc. We have been together for about 6 months and 3 months ago is when the stress/ anxiety started due to a new work schedule. Previous to this change he was able to climax/ejaculate without problem, sometimes it would take a little while but he always could. In the last couple months maybe 3 times out of the last 10 times we have had sex he has ejaculated/climaxed, this seriously frustrates him, I am being understanding and told him that if he worries about it too much it may not happen. So 45 minutes of sex and we are both exhausted, and in pain so we just stop. This makes him want sex even less because he gets so frustrated. I am aware of Delayed Ejaculation , and I believe the amount of stress he has been under is causing this issue, but I don t know how to help relax him so that he can fully enjoy a sexual encounter.
Asked On : Mon, 28 May 2012
Answers:  1 Views:  177
Report Abuse
Share on Facebook
Share on Twitter
Share on Google+
Question is related to
Diseases and Conditions
Psychiatrist 's  Response
This is an annoying and upsetting problem for you both, I am sure. There is no doubt that if he is experiencing high stress levels at work, this can affect his ability to orgasm and ejaculate. My suggestion is that he use masturbation as a "rehearsal" for sex. If he can masturbate to orgasm/ejaculation successfully, then this may translate into better results as a couple in the bedroom. Also, he may be able to finish better with manual or oral sex techniques than with vaginal intercourse. The vagina is sometimes not tight enough and not guided enough a stimulation to allow for a good excitement phase that plateaus prior to orgasm/ejaculation. There is no use engaging in intercourse for 45 minutes if he doesn't feel aroused to a reasonable plateau at any point. It's better for him to pull out at some point and for you to try to finish him off with your hands, mouth, or even both and see if this works better for him. Communication during the act is crucial. You should ask him what he wants/needs from you and he should feel free and easy expressing this to you. This communication will also help him overcome this issue. It's great that you aren't pressuring him to perform, because that would certainly make it worse. Relaxing is more useful, for both of you. Best of luck and I hope things improve soon.
Answered: Fri, 6 Jul 2012
I find this answer helpful
Disclaimer: These answers are for your information only and not intended to replace your relationship with your treating physician.
This is a short, free answer. For a more detailed, immediate answer, try our premium service [Sample answer]


Loading Online Doctors....
© Ebix, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
All the information, content and live chat provided on the site is intended to be for informational purposes only, and not a substitute for professional or medical advice. You should always speak with your doctor before you follow anything that you read on this website. Any health question asked on this site will be visible to the people who browse this site. Hence, the user assumes the responsibility not to divulge any personally identifiable information in the question. Use of this site is subject to our Terms & Conditions
Already Rated.
Your rating:

Ask a Doctor