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How To Avoid Stress In Married Life?
Question: Hello Doc XXXXXXX
I have a serious problem which gives intense stress. I am married for 6 years and i am 36 now with one daughter. Me and my wife both are working. To add to my stress. I am working in night shift and my wife in day shift. We rarely get time to spent together. I am a person with loads of emotional feelings. I dont know whether its natural or problem with me..but i always want some one to love me, care me. In fact i am very romantic. From the last 4 years i feel i am not getting that love from my wife. She always reject meveven if i touch her. I dont have many friends to whom i can talk about this and relax a bit. Its giving me so much stress that i am unable to sleep. The only way i can able to sleep is by taking restyl 0.5 tablet almost every alternate day.
I can even understand that there is no problem with my wife..she may not like anyone to disturb her during late night at around 4 AM in the morning.
To get rid of this problem what i want to know to find out any medicines that can help me to suppress all my feelings for love, sex, romance etc. Now i need to ignore all these to focus on my work. I want my stress to be relieved.
Can you please help. I want to know from a lady doctor to find out, if there is anything wrong with my wife or its quite natural and i am in the wrong side.
My ultimate aim is to suppress everything to lead a happy life.
Thanks,
XXXX
I have a serious problem which gives intense stress. I am married for 6 years and i am 36 now with one daughter. Me and my wife both are working. To add to my stress. I am working in night shift and my wife in day shift. We rarely get time to spent together. I am a person with loads of emotional feelings. I dont know whether its natural or problem with me..but i always want some one to love me, care me. In fact i am very romantic. From the last 4 years i feel i am not getting that love from my wife. She always reject meveven if i touch her. I dont have many friends to whom i can talk about this and relax a bit. Its giving me so much stress that i am unable to sleep. The only way i can able to sleep is by taking restyl 0.5 tablet almost every alternate day.
I can even understand that there is no problem with my wife..she may not like anyone to disturb her during late night at around 4 AM in the morning.
To get rid of this problem what i want to know to find out any medicines that can help me to suppress all my feelings for love, sex, romance etc. Now i need to ignore all these to focus on my work. I want my stress to be relieved.
Can you please help. I want to know from a lady doctor to find out, if there is anything wrong with my wife or its quite natural and i am in the wrong side.
My ultimate aim is to suppress everything to lead a happy life.
Thanks,
XXXX
Brief Answer:
It's natural. talk to her
Detailed Answer:
Hi,
I am Dr Mittal.
I have read your query.
I think I would be able to help you.
The fact remains that the problem you have stated is probably due to lack of communication. You both work in different shifts and hardly get time to know each other.
But that need nor mean that she is not interested in you anymore. As you have said, maybe she does not want to be disturbed at those hours. After all ,she has a work schedule too with her own work stressor.
I think it would be good for you 2 to sit and discuss it. It is better than medicines. Understanding each others constraints and needs are important.
You may come up with a solution. Even if it may mean changing the job. And it may be better for you to change to day shift. Night shifts are not physiologically correct and healthy. You can talk to your bosses for rotation of duties.
As for women, there is always a middle aged time when they reduce the intimacy. It's hormonal for her too.
I think you need to talk to her. And choose what's more important, job or family. Select your priority. Your choices eventually choose you.
I have tried to make it as simple as possible.
I hope that this helps you.
Please feel free to contact us for more information.
Best of luck.
Dr Mittal.
It's natural. talk to her
Detailed Answer:
Hi,
I am Dr Mittal.
I have read your query.
I think I would be able to help you.
The fact remains that the problem you have stated is probably due to lack of communication. You both work in different shifts and hardly get time to know each other.
But that need nor mean that she is not interested in you anymore. As you have said, maybe she does not want to be disturbed at those hours. After all ,she has a work schedule too with her own work stressor.
I think it would be good for you 2 to sit and discuss it. It is better than medicines. Understanding each others constraints and needs are important.
You may come up with a solution. Even if it may mean changing the job. And it may be better for you to change to day shift. Night shifts are not physiologically correct and healthy. You can talk to your bosses for rotation of duties.
As for women, there is always a middle aged time when they reduce the intimacy. It's hormonal for her too.
I think you need to talk to her. And choose what's more important, job or family. Select your priority. Your choices eventually choose you.
I have tried to make it as simple as possible.
I hope that this helps you.
Please feel free to contact us for more information.
Best of luck.
Dr Mittal.
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Raju A.T
Thank You, Dr. Mittal.
I completely agree with your suggestions. I do know there is a lack of communication between us. In fact we hardly talk during weekdays, not even get an opportunity to see each other. The gap is increasing a lot.
Whereas I am in a situation where there is no option to change the shift timings & a day shift job.
I feel like going to a psychiatrist to do my brain wash :) I hope you can understand the needs of a man and what happen if its not fulfilled.
Its now almost 4 years, since we have a schedule like this. Now I am in a situation where I stopped talking to anyone, always remain quite, not leading a social life. You may not believe but I feel like running away leaving everything or finish up my life but unable to do so only for my daughter.
I want to get rid of these needs, which can also make me able to focus on my job. Whereas I will definitely try the first step to communicate with her to check if that will help me.
Finally Thank You very much for replying & providing me some valuable suggestions.
I completely agree with your suggestions. I do know there is a lack of communication between us. In fact we hardly talk during weekdays, not even get an opportunity to see each other. The gap is increasing a lot.
Whereas I am in a situation where there is no option to change the shift timings & a day shift job.
I feel like going to a psychiatrist to do my brain wash :) I hope you can understand the needs of a man and what happen if its not fulfilled.
Its now almost 4 years, since we have a schedule like this. Now I am in a situation where I stopped talking to anyone, always remain quite, not leading a social life. You may not believe but I feel like running away leaving everything or finish up my life but unable to do so only for my daughter.
I want to get rid of these needs, which can also make me able to focus on my job. Whereas I will definitely try the first step to communicate with her to check if that will help me.
Finally Thank You very much for replying & providing me some valuable suggestions.
Brief Answer:
Best of luck
Detailed Answer:
Its my absolute pleasure to be of help.
Remember life has many gifts.
Money and job are man made restrictions.
Live free
Dr Mittal
Best of luck
Detailed Answer:
Its my absolute pleasure to be of help.
Remember life has many gifts.
Money and job are man made restrictions.
Live free
Dr Mittal
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Ashwin Bhandari
Answered by
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