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Was it my fault I was raped ?

I spent a year in therapy being told that it was not my fault that I was raped even though I was the one that voluntarily decided to hang out with him that day (was a coworker) almost a year and a half after the rape I am still getting emails and contacted from his friends and others who worked with us (i has since gotten out of that job) saying that it was my fault? These are people that knew both me and therapist only knows me so she probably just saying that its not my fault cause she does not know him. so was it my fault for voluntarily choosing to hang out with him? he was nice to me and i never felt threatened prior to the rape and i considered him a friend in addition to a coworker. oh yeah a few more details 1. neither of us were drinking 2. we were hanging out just shopping, etc..then he drove me to a field in the middle of nowhere and raped me. i did not know where we were or anything 3. i was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt so its not like i was dressed provacative or anything. 4. we hung out other times before he raped me. never felt threatened those times. 5. i was new to town so i did not know anyone outside of work and was just happy that i finally made a friend
Asked On : Tue, 22 Dec 2009
Answers:  1 Views:  434
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  User's Response
No it's not your fault no matter what anyone says. I understand why you even put that into question. But it's not. You saw him as a friend. And he was nice to you. So naturally any woman would want to hang out with some like that. You didn't know that was going to happen. He was the one that made a wrong decision. Not you. I'm sure you've heard this too...guys saying, "You're teasing me..." When all you are doing is just sitting there. Guys are just absolute jerks. You didn't do anything. People are cruel. You didn't ask for it. That's why it's rape. And it's ridicuous that to this day they feel the need to harass you about something you already feel horrible about. Now I don't know exactly what happened or how it happened. But I'm sure you already just be careful about the vibe you give off and the way you dress. If you know you didn't do anyhthing wrong in that department, you really have nothing to worry about, and should try and keep your head high and move forward. Maybe change your email adress to help with that process.
Answered: Tue, 22 Dec 2009
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