I undersatnd the stress that you must be undergoing.But you need not worry as there is lot that can be done. I would suggest the following
1. Urodynamic testing
2. Gynaec evaluation
After the 3 options are exercised adecision needs to be made as to the exact type of incontinence that you are suffering from.This will then dicate the nature of treatment which may range from pelvic floor physiotherapy
to surgical intervention. If properly evaluated the success rate is very good.