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Suffering from Chronic depression symptoms, please help him

My husband is 37 yrs old. he is currently living and running a business alone abroad I have moved to India with our children due to financial difficulties there. Since sometimes now he has been having major mood swings and one minute he will call to tell me he loves me and wants me to move back and the next that we should get divorced as we fight a lot. He blames the whole world for everything that goes wrong and considers me his enemy , that i am trying to destroy his reputation. i consulted a friend who after hearing all this said that from her experience, he was suffering from chronic depression symptoms and that he should consult a medical Doctor as there are medications that can help him. please help me in how to handle this. I tried to suggest to him that he should see a doc . and he lost his head that I was trying to prove him mad. PLEASE HELP.
Asked On : Tue, 8 Feb 2011
Answers:  3 Views:  303
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Psychiatrist 's  Response

A very typical reaction from our country regarding psychiatric illnesses.

He is stressed out that's for sure. Weather he is suffering from depression or not depends on various symptoms like how is his sleep, appetite, mood, energy levels, attention concentration etc etc etc......he will need a full psychiatric assessment.

From what you have explained, it seems he will not consult a psychiatrist.

The following are the options in no particular order of preference
1. Keep trying to make him see the sense in going for an assessment so that "both of you could be assessed"...make sure that he understands you are suffering as well and may be if he comes there may be something that you may change in how you are etc etc etc....trying anything not to make him think its only him. Keep at it for long and atleast to get rid of your "nagging" he may come once......but I dont see much long term benefit in this.

2. consult a general physician...both of you...who knows and deals with psychiatric problems...that may be more acceptable to your husband

3. ask him if he would be ok to talk to a psychiatrist online....there are expert specialist services available on this site where you can have a psychaitrist consult via chat and that may reduce the stigma even further to your husband.

Keep insisting that it is for both of your assessment...which truly it should be....and then only for an initial assessment

keep talking to him about not just medicines that help but also talking therapies...or better use counselling rather than therapies make it more palatable to him

Finally, in some countries, there is still a practise of covert administration of medication...i.e giving medicine without someone's knowledge. This will depend on the legalities involved and the best practise of that country.

Hope this helps. Good Luck to both of you.
Answered: Wed, 9 Feb 2011
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  User's Response
Thanks Doc, u seem to be making immense sense...the only problem is tht he is living alone there....and I wont be able to join if for atleast another 2 mths, Kindly suggest some other ways also in which I can help him from India, besides that do u think it is a good idea to talk to his friend living in the same city and have him talk to my husband or atleast keep a eye on him becoz I afraid he is suffering more due to loneliness, he was a very social person but since I have left has not kept in touch with many of our friends. Is it possible to have consultation with u online? is it better to talk to him alone or shld i be a part of it? Will u be able to also prescribe medicines if needed. Thanks again for ur help. Regards.
Answered: Wed, 9 Feb 2011
Psychiatrist Dr. B Raghavendra's  Response
Hi SalmaKapasi,

Please keep talking to your husband daily if necessary, if finances allow for the next two months. Yes, it might be better to ask your hubby's friend to keep a track of him i.e monitor him but not to talk to him about this as your hubby might get upset about that.

Yes I do online consultations. As long as one of you is in India, I can even prescribe medication but I would suggest that we should not go for medication first. Let me assess him and then decide if and what kind of help he needs. He might just need 2-3 sessions of counselling rather than any medication.

I would prefer if you could consult me online first and give me all the required information so that I could assess what can be done. Then I would prefer that both of you come for online assessment.

The consultation can be by just phone or live chat or even email .....please see the services section of this website for the pricing and other details. I will be able to provide consultation between 0830 am till 1330 hrs in the morning as per Indian timings or from 1030pm till midnight 0130 am.

Please do let me know if you encounter any problems in getting these services if you wish to do so.

Good Luck
Answered: Thu, 10 Feb 2011
I find this answer helpful
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