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Mother hit herself in her temple and died, father wont get any help or anything, tried to replay it. What to do ?

My mother past away February 10th. Its been the hardest thing I ve had to go threw! My father has been married to my mother Jeannine Russow for 34 years. She shot herself in the temple It went in the right side an came outa the middle of the front part of her head. I got the call at 4:30 am its killing me inside I don t no how to deal myself an my dads loosing his mind!!! I m the youngest of three girls. Even being the youngest I m the rock to the family everyone comes to me! Its a tough position an not sure how to keep that roll at this time!!! Please help me help my father? He won t go get help in any way no pills or anything! He watched her do it an he cought her in his arms she used a 44 an he replays it in his head over an over!!!
Asked On : Thu, 7 Mar 2013
Answers:  2 Views:  16
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Psychiatrist 's  Response
Dec 2014
Welcome to HCM

I am sorry about your mother. She shot herself in last month and your father has witnessed it. It was a married life of 34 years. So its natural to have such of grief reaction. Grief reaction like low mood, crying spells, not accepting incident, de realization etc is considered as normal to some extent. But you have mentioned that he replays the incident in his head, he is loosing his mind. This is not normal. Try to talk with him and explore if there is any suicidal intention. Closely watch him and give warm supportive care. It has been about 40 days of your mothers death so such levels of grief are not acceptable. He may develop Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I advise you to take him to a Psychiatrist ASAP for immediate control of his symptoms.
You have mentioned that you are also feeling low to some extent. But if this is not affecting your occupational and social life then its acceptable. Try to help your father, he need help from you.

Dr. Seikhoo Bishnoi
Answered: Mon, 18 Mar 2013
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Psychiatrist Dr. Gourav Monga's  Response

welcome to health care magic

I can understand your situation and empathize with you. Its difficult to bear such loss. I appreciate your courage to seek online help in such conditions.
Its the time when your father needs you the most. Keep yourself and your sisters with him most of the time. Relax yourself and your father with some sort of relaxing techniques like deep breathing.
Consult a psychiatrist for detailed evaluation as he might need some antianxiety/antidepressants agents as he probably have "Acute grief reaction". Also psychotherapy/counselling sessions are required.

Wish him good health
Dr. Gourav Monga
Consultant Psychiatrist
Answered: Tue, 19 Mar 2013
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