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Depressed due to mothers alcoholism. She has mental issues, cunning, full of hatred. Suggestions?

i am depressed due to my mothers alcoholism , she really does not care about her children although we are grown up now. She quite clearly has mental issues and alcohol really brings them out. I feel there is nothing i can do as she does t want to help herself. She just feels sorry for herself all the time. she is the most horrible , messed up person i have met in my life! She is quite cunning and can appear to be ok when people talk to her but she is full of hate!
Asked On : Tue, 15 Jan 2013
Answers:  1 Views:  23
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Psychiatrist 's  Response
Hello and welcome to Healthcare Magic. Thanks for your query.

I'm sorry to hear about your problems. I can understand that you must be going through a very difficult time. It is obvious that currently you are under a lot of mental stress and tension. However, it is important that you keep your stress levels under control, otherwise it would have adverse consequences not only on your mental health but also on your physical health as well.

Now, you mention that most of your stress is due to your mother's attitude and behaviour and that she is doing it willfully. In this situation, you must first keep yourself calm and composed in order to solve this problem better. If you become extremely affected, stressed out and depressed, then the problem will only be getting more complicated. You have to first accept the fact that this is her nature and that it is not possible to change it immediately. Once you are able to accept this, then you will slowly learn not to get so affected by her behaviour and hence not get so stressed out. I'm not saying that what she doing is right, but the fact is that she is if she is doing it purposely and you are left with no choice. So, from your side, the best option would be to learn how not to get affected by this as much as possible.

If you are feeling depressed and finding it difficult to cope up, I would advise you to see a psychiatrist for a detailed evaluation. If necessary, you may need medication for a short duration to relax your mind and control your anxiety. You also need to go for regular counselling sessions to learn coping skills and stress management techniques.

Wish you all the best.

Dr. Jonas Sundarakumar
Consultant Psychiatrist
Answered: Wed, 16 Jan 2013
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