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Dr. Andrew Rynne
MD
Dr. Andrew Rynne

Family Physician

Exp 50 years

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Boyfriend Having Habit Of Breaking Up, Getting Back, Hurts, Has Several Relationships. What Should I Do?

My boyfriend of 2 years has this habit of breaking up with me whenever I get a bit stressed or emotional, then after a few days wants to get back together.This has happened several times, the last times around 4 mnths ago I told him it was very hurtful and if he ever did it again that would be the end. He did it again 4 days ago, and is now sending light hearted messages to me trying to get me to chat to him. This behaviour is hurtful and confusing. Most of the time he tells me he loves me, hasnt felt this way about anyone before and wants me and my children to move in with him. He refuses to move to my town, but this is where my support network of friends and family are. Sometimes he says things that I deem to be insensitive, is intolerant of peoples troubles and seems to be quite set in his ways. He thinks I am over sensitive, and I do admit I do worry about things. I do a little voluntary work and very much care about the people I help in this field, when I try to discuss this with him he doesnt seem to understand. He can be very caring and his cold behaviour does seem to come out of the blue. He is 50 and never been married but has had several relationships of a number of years. He is proud of his achievements despite not having the support of his parents when he was younger and will often talk about that. I love him and care for him, yet the emotional rollercoaster is draining and I just want to feel secure and loved in my relationship. Id there anything I can do to change his benhaviour or do I just let him go for good ?
Wed, 12 Jun 2013
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Pediatrician, Infectious Diseases 's  Response
Hello,
Welcome to HealthcareMagic forum.
This behaviour is definitely not normal and you should not put up with it.
If you really want your relation to work out you both should consult a counseller or psychologist for help .You yourself cannot make him change unless he has the insight and the will to do so.
So go ahead and give him a last chance but if the situation persists then move on.

Wishing you good luck.
Regards
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Boyfriend Having Habit Of Breaking Up, Getting Back, Hurts, Has Several Relationships. What Should I Do?

Hello, Welcome to HealthcareMagic forum. This behaviour is definitely not normal and you should not put up with it. If you really want your relation to work out you both should consult a counseller or psychologist for help .You yourself cannot make him change unless he has the insight and the will to do so. So go ahead and give him a last chance but if the situation persists then move on. Wishing you good luck. Regards