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Suggest remedy for difficulty in penetration during intercourse

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Dr. Chintan Solanki

Psychiatrist

Practicing since :2007

Answered : 2406 Questions

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Posted on Mon, 19 Oct 2015 in General Health
Question: Hi doctor,

I got married recently. I am not able to enjoy my sex life. I am not able to insert my penis comfortably, because of lubrication. Even if I am successful, I am losing erection after some time. My fore skin is being pulled back (more than 1-2 inches from tip). I am removing my penis when I feel something uncomfortable. I am feeling scary when I see my inner penis exposed like that. It’s not paining when it happens, but I am not feeling comfortable. Is it normal? Or is my fore skin too lose?

I tried using durex play lubricant. I feel comfortable when I use it. But my wife is complaining that she is getting itching for 1-2 days after using it. And also we want to have baby. I read on the label of the lubricant that it reduces the chances of pregnancy. Is it safe to use these commercially available lubricants?

I am 29 years old. My wife is 26 years old. What is the best age to have baby, just from health perspective?

Thanks you.
doctor
Answered by Dr. Chintan Solanki 1 hour later
Brief Answer:
Use Ky Jelly lubricant it is water based

Detailed Answer:
Hello XXXXXXX

Thanks for writing to us.

I cannot get exact content of durex play. Many females are allergic to lubricant and likely your wife felt allergic problem due to lubricant. I recommend KY jelly water based lubricant which is the least allergic. Ask your wife to apply small amount before sex and wait for one hour to check for any allergic/itching problem and then you can use it.

I get this type of question frequently from newly married couple.After marriage many couples like you suffer from difficulty in sex life.Sometime it will take 2-3 months to reach to normal sex life. Most of them do not have any physical problem. This happens due to fear or anxiety of either of the partner.

It is rather good that your foreskin is easily retractable otherwise it can create problem. I think you should first enjoy romance and foreplay in few attempts to check how much natural lubrication is there without thinking or worrying about penetration and sex. If your wife feels that there is no lubrication then only use KY jelly.
No need to feel scary or apprehensive when inner penis (glans penis) exposed and entered in t o vagina. It is absolutely normal having some uncomfortable sensation initially. You can just go ahead and later on you will be accustomed and have pleasurable sensation.
Other option is use condom. It will reduce your uncomfortable sensation. Keep condom ready before you begin foreplay. When your penis is fully erect wear the condom without apprehension of losing erection. Ask your wife to give continuous stimulation (the way you like) to keep you arouse while you are wearing condom. Wear condom after retracting foreskin fully and exposing glans penis completely.

A female should have pregnancy before age of 30 for the best outcome while male age is before 35. As such KY jelly is non toxic and does not affect sperms but we cannot say that it is totally safe for pregnancy and cannot reduce chance of being pregnant.
Hope I have answered your query, I will be happy to help further.

Regards

Dr.Chintan Solanki.

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
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