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How To Handle Emotional Break Down?

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Posted on Fri, 28 Feb 2014
Question: Hi, I hope you can help me. I split up with my boyfriend about 3 and a half months ago. I was going out with him for about 4 years. I felt that I would have worked to save the relationship but I could tell he didn't want to so I left. He said his feelings had changed and we were always arguing and that I was too clingy and that he didnt like some aspects of the way I was living my life. He also had issues with my family and some of my friends. I was very upset about the end of the relationship but I tried to stay strong. About 2 months after we broke up I happened to see him with someone else and it really hurt. I was shocked and in so much pain at first but it was my turning point and I gradually started to get over him. My problem is that when I drink alcohol, the next day I feel down and then start to miss him. I made the mistake of texting him a general text this evening but he did not reply and it hurt. It makes me wonder why he ignores me and if there is something wrong with me and I am the cause of the end of the relationship and that I'm not loveable.I dont know, I just feel so upset about it all at the moment
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Answered by Dr. Vivek Chail (1 hour later)
Brief Answer: High levels of alcohol intake Detailed Answer: Hi XXXX Thanks for writing in to us. I have read through your query in detail. It is good that you tried to be strong towards the end of your relationship. Please understand that usually once a relationship is over, it is over for the good and there should be no looking back. However, it is difficult to completely ignore and get things out of your mind and that is when you try to relax by having a drink or two. Alcohol taken in small amounts can be relaxing but often an individual cant stop drinking and then the alcohol intake goes up. When the circulating blood levels of alcohol rise beyond a certain level it reaches the brain and causes loss of inhibitions and also leads to altered sensorium with very high blood levels of alcohol. This can persist for few hours and might be exactly why you feel down and start to miss him. If you look at the bigger picture, you are no longer in a relationship with him and there is no reason to feel ignored and unloved. Probably, as you have told, he has started to move ahead in life. I suggest you take counseling if you are not able to get over him and feel upset. It is important to take charge of your own life and move on. Please drink alcohol responsibly and try to stop when you are done with a drink or two. Hope your query is answered. Do write back if you have any doubts. Regards, Dr.Vivek
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Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
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Answered by
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Dr. Vivek Chail

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Practicing since :2002

Answered : 6874 Questions

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How To Handle Emotional Break Down?

Brief Answer: High levels of alcohol intake Detailed Answer: Hi XXXX Thanks for writing in to us. I have read through your query in detail. It is good that you tried to be strong towards the end of your relationship. Please understand that usually once a relationship is over, it is over for the good and there should be no looking back. However, it is difficult to completely ignore and get things out of your mind and that is when you try to relax by having a drink or two. Alcohol taken in small amounts can be relaxing but often an individual cant stop drinking and then the alcohol intake goes up. When the circulating blood levels of alcohol rise beyond a certain level it reaches the brain and causes loss of inhibitions and also leads to altered sensorium with very high blood levels of alcohol. This can persist for few hours and might be exactly why you feel down and start to miss him. If you look at the bigger picture, you are no longer in a relationship with him and there is no reason to feel ignored and unloved. Probably, as you have told, he has started to move ahead in life. I suggest you take counseling if you are not able to get over him and feel upset. It is important to take charge of your own life and move on. Please drink alcohol responsibly and try to stop when you are done with a drink or two. Hope your query is answered. Do write back if you have any doubts. Regards, Dr.Vivek