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How to deal with a talkative wife?

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Practicing since : 2004
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my wife is 34 years old. We are married for past 12 years. We have 2 children. My wife has a problem of excessive talking. She talks continuously recollecting past petty small arguements between us. She recollects time and again same old arguements and utters the same old words or sentences. It is her daily routine. She starts discussion without anyone asking her any question. Either she quarrels or tries to talk explaining something which anyone doesn't ask for. I mean we feel the topic she raises irrelevant and unsuitable for that particular period. When I consulted some psychiatrist near my house a few years back,(this problem of her is persisting for past 5 or six years, increasing by the day) he suggested me to give her traze 25 mg tablet at 8 pm. She never used it although. Doctor told me that this tablet induces sleep as well as helps in forgetting old matters. Can you help me out with any suggestions of medicine which is not addictive? She is reluctant to come to a psychiatrist. She is also having thyroid multinodular goitre though the hormones are under normal level. What is her disorder called? iAM WORRIED BECAUSE EXCESSIVE TALKING BY HER IS ALSO AFFECTING HER THROAT WHICH WENT HOARSE A FEW MONTHS BACK AS VOCAL CHORDS GOT DAMAGED. ENT DOCTOR GAVE HER ANTIBIOTICS FOR 15 DAYS AND WARNED HER NOT TO TALK TOO MUCH.
Posted Sat, 25 Jan 2014 in Mental Health
Answered by Dr. Saumya Mittal 53 minutes later
Brief Answer: Need more details Detailed Answer: Hi, welcome to our site. I am Dr Saumya Mittal. Read your query. That is a very significant question and i appreciate your problem. I will try my best to answer your query Unfortunately I need more details. Does she have visions, as in things she sees that are not around her? Could she be possibly be stressed by some issue, or maybe she is missing someone? Has she at anytime said she is hearing voices? Has she ever felt persecuted? Does she say she has headaches, or nausea, or vomiting? Any tragedies at the time of onset of symptoms? Are the problems she is raising many years old, or more recent? And are they the same problems? Have we ever had an mri of the brain done? It would be helpful if it has not be done so far. And what are the medicines she is taking got thyroid disorder? Why were the medicines previously prescribed not taken? I know this does not help you much yet. Inform the reports mentioned above so i can be of help further. Best of luck. I have given you the answer to the maximum considering the information provided. The results of the tests could further enhance my answer to you. Please do understand that some details could be extracted from a detailed history and examination. Looking forward to your return query with the details asked so that I can help you further. (If the answer has helped you, please indicate this)
Above answer was peer-reviewed by
Follow-up: How to deal with a talkative wife? 1 hour later
Dear Dr, No vomiting, no nausea, no headache, no voices, no visions. She had tuberculomas of brain some 6 or 7 years back. She got treated. She became normal. May be MRI was done that time. Tragedy, yes there was one tragedy in our brothers family for which my wife always thinks that my brothers family may be suspecting her to be the reason for the tragedy. But time and again during discussions with my wife my brothers family clarified that they forgot the tragedy and doesn't suspect my wife to be the reason for the tragedy. But she makes it a point to mention about that tragedy during any quarrel between us. She promised many times that since my brothers family has cleared her doubt, she will not raise that tragedy anymore in any discussions. But she continues to do so. Not only depressed state, she even during happy moments repeats the same word and sentence time and again. For example, " Madhumitha Madhumitha have your food, REPEAT". She forces children to eat food in time while they try to postpone it. She then shouts on them. Then I shout on her not to shout on them. She neither commands respect nor fear from the children. If I say this to her, she blames me for even this. I don't understand how Iam responsible. Thyroid no medicine as hormones are under normal level. A REQUEST. CAN MY QUESTION BE ANSWERED BY A PSYCHIATRIST? I would be glad if it can be done. Thank you.
Answered by Dr. Saumya Mittal 3 minutes later
Brief Answer: Please contact customer support team... Detailed Answer: Hi, Since you have used Ask a Doctor package, your query is revealed to all specialist. And as I have had enough experience dealing with psychiatry patients, I choose to answer your query. You can write to customer support team at YYYY@YYYY requesting them to post your concern to psychiatrist. Alternatively you can use Ask a Specialist package to contact a psychiatrist directly. Wish you good luck. Regards
Above answer was peer-reviewed by
Follow-up: How to deal with a talkative wife? 1 hour later
Dear Dr Iam not aware of special packages. That is why I asked my query in ask a doctor package. I request you to please reply for my above query as you have already treated psychiatric patients. Thank you.
Answered by Dr. Saumya Mittal 16 minutes later
Brief Answer: Counselling is needed Detailed Answer: Dear friend. There are two issues I would like to focus your attention to. First, you do say that she has had this problem since the tragedy in the family. And while your brother's family has made it clear that she is not held responsible, it is obvious that she has not got over it. She still feels responsible in some way and probably that is what has affected her thinking. Secondly, I would suggest that you do not scream at her. You gave the example that she screams at the children, and then you scream at her (probably in front of the kids). And finally you say that the kids don't respect or fear her. Frankly, would you fear your mom if your dad screamed at her for scolding you? This might be sounding personal, but think about it. I would suggest that instead of screaming, try to get her relaxed. Try to soothe her nerves. Yelling will probably only make her more jittery. A bit of empathy from you may help her more than the shouting. In the last response you have still not answered as to why the medicine prescribed was not taken. I would suggest you start them. If possible, encourage her to consult a psychiatrist as professional one to one counseling will best suit her. She probably needs long term care with counseling and medications. Regards
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