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How Can Academic Pressure, Relationship Issues And Thoughts Of Infidelity Be Managed?

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Posted on Fri, 3 Nov 2017
Question: I will start my story. I was attending a high school. I was sent a warning letter about the attendance. The reason I am absent is because my class in particular and my school in general are from China. Only me from Vietnam and so much pressure on that. But I try to study and the result is not so bad. But my mother did not understand and when she received the warning letter she was very angry with me. But that does not matter. I am feeling pressured because my family does not have much money and is almost incapable of going to school. I was planning to visit my family on the summer vacation but now because of the money pressure I can not go back. And another problem is affection. I'm dating someone 2 years older than me. He loves me so much but recently I felt that he and I did not understand each other and often quarreled. At the same time at this time a person I loved before came back and wanted to meet me and just want to have sex with me. But I can not because I have a boyfriend. But I love him too. what should I do? I felt very pressured and led to negative thoughts and I did a stupid act to hurt myself.
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Answered by Dr. Ashok Kumar (1 hour later)
Brief Answer:
I do not think you need to go with ex guy

Detailed Answer:
Hello,
Thanks for using Heathcaremagic.

I read your query and understand your concerns about ongoing issues with relationship, financial and academic ones.

Since the academic part is blown out of proportion by school in my opinion you need to refocus on your studies to prove them wrong. At the same time it is important to communicate properly with your parents so they can settle there worry. The anger of your mother is something related to many issues and no middle class family can afford a warning letter from school.

Regarding relationship issues I am not convinced with idea of having sex with a guy who do not have any emotional connection with you unless otherwise you are genuinely interested. I understand at the time of stress we have feeling of social isolation and need pampering but I do not think the only sex can give you the required emotional support.

I hope this helps you.
Feel free to write back to me if you have more questions.
Thanks and regards.

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
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Answered by
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Dr. Ashok Kumar

Psychiatrist

Practicing since :2000

Answered : 3315 Questions

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How Can Academic Pressure, Relationship Issues And Thoughts Of Infidelity Be Managed?

Brief Answer: I do not think you need to go with ex guy Detailed Answer: Hello, Thanks for using Heathcaremagic. I read your query and understand your concerns about ongoing issues with relationship, financial and academic ones. Since the academic part is blown out of proportion by school in my opinion you need to refocus on your studies to prove them wrong. At the same time it is important to communicate properly with your parents so they can settle there worry. The anger of your mother is something related to many issues and no middle class family can afford a warning letter from school. Regarding relationship issues I am not convinced with idea of having sex with a guy who do not have any emotional connection with you unless otherwise you are genuinely interested. I understand at the time of stress we have feeling of social isolation and need pampering but I do not think the only sex can give you the required emotional support. I hope this helps you. Feel free to write back to me if you have more questions. Thanks and regards.