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Why is my child crying badly during night? - Online Doctor Chats

Date : 15-Jan-2014
User rating for this question
Very Good Posted in: Child Health
Answered by

General & Family Physician
Practicing since : 2009
Answered : 983 Questions
User:Good Morning Doctor
Doctor:good morning
User:..I have a 17 Months daughter
Doctor:good to know that
User:she stays with my in-laws at our home town..since both of us are working
Doctor:please proceed
User:we visit her on weekends and extended leaves wenver we are able to avail
Doctor:all right
User:she will stay with me very well during the day time
User:but at night she will cry for my mother in law to be beside her before falling asleep
User:she will not even have her bottle of milk if she is not present
Doctor:this is natural for her
User:if in case we bring her to stay with us do you think she will not be comfortable to stay with us
User:but what can i do to make her comfortable with me during nights
Doctor:she will have discomfort in the beginning
Doctor:it will take some time for her to adjust
User:daytime wenevr i feed her she will have milk and sleep next to me
User:only issue is during night time
Doctor:after all since you both are parents, it must not be difficult for her to adjust to the new environment quickly
User:but my husband is wooried if she does not stay here then how we will manage
Doctor:not to worry about this
Doctor:as a mother, she will get used to you first
Doctor:eventually she well get used to the father as well
Doctor:It would take a matter of few days for her to settle down
Doctor:You may have trouble for a few nights
Doctor:thats all
User:ok..but it will not affect her health or give her any insecurity feeling isnt it
Doctor:how old is she?
User:17 months
Doctor:17 months right
Doctor:This age is too early for the baby to feel insecure
Doctor:She would definitely miss her grandmother
Doctor:she will get used to you all and the new environment soon
Doctor:Also, it is important for the babies to stay with their parents rather than other family members
User:but i feel scared about night times..since i have seen her eact in that manner
User:we wish to get her to stay with us in 3 months frm now
User:she will be 21 months then
Doctor:you can have other relatives at home for sometime until the time she gets used to it
Doctor:having another family member will be better for you at nights
Doctor:to take care of the baby
Doctor:you can ask your mom in law to stay with you all for sometime here
User:then when she leaves wil she not again search for her
Doctor:by that time, you must make her used to you
Doctor:then she will not search for her
User:this is ome kind of phobia developed in me
User:wen its evening time i get tensed up
User:that my baby does not want me
Doctor:it is better for you to cuddle up with your baby at the earliest
User:am sorry..i am taking lot of your time
Doctor:that is ok
Doctor:these kind of problems arise after around 3 years
Doctor:so, the earlier you get attached with your baby, the better for you
User:ok..after 3 yrs it will be difficult for her to get adjusted to me it means,
Doctor:the child can have adjustment problems then
Doctor:social and behavioral problems can arise
Doctor:but your focus now should be on getting your child back to you
User:oh ok..
Doctor:and making her used to you and your husband
User:evryone will be saying she will not saty without her grandmother
User:she thinks mum in law is her mother
User:its developing a complex in me if i can handle her alone
User:i love my child
User:and i feel depressed due to this
Doctor:If you love your child, you should keep her with you
Doctor:and you should take care of her
Doctor:your child should be your first concern rather than anything else
User:yes..that true..due to unavoidable circumstances we both are working
User:or else i do not think this situation would have coe
Doctor:I understand
Doctor:but it is not too late now
User:even if i leave my job i will need atleast 3more months to complete the formalities
User:notice period etc
Doctor:bring your kid home at the earliest
Doctor:ask your mom in law for frequent home visits initially
Doctor:once your kid is comfortable, then you have nothing to worry
User:ok..:)..thanks Dr, feel relieved speaking to you
Doctor:my pleasure
Doctor:wish you good health
Doctor:not to worry much
Doctor:take care
Doctor:shall we end the chat now?
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