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Suggest treatment for narcissistic personalty disorder - Online Doctor Chats

Date : 18-Apr-2014
User rating for this question
Very Good Posted in: Mental Health
Answered by

General & Family Physician
Practicing since : 2005
Answered : 2408 Questions
User:Hi The specialty i am looking for is psychology or psychiatry. It is with regards to my wife.I think she has histrionic or narcissistic personalty disorder (also maybe BPD). I am planning to divorce her but i have asked a psychiatrist and they have warned me that she may try to harm herself if i tell her. I would like to have another opinion. Life with her has become unbreakable, she has constant mood swings seeks constant attention something very small can trigger rage with her and gets mad for days and does not forgive me easily. She puts me against my parents. I feel myself constantly have to lie to her that i love her which i don't(If I don't do this we will have fights that will last for days). I really have no energy anymore. If i divorce her will she try to harm herself from your experince
Doctor:Hi
Doctor:I just went over your information here
Doctor:now, the thing is narcissistic personalty disorder is not a situation where one harms oneself
Doctor:So may I ask from whom you got the info that she would hurt herself?
User:I asked a psychiatrists
User:sorry one psychiatrist
Doctor:hmmm
Doctor:i disagree, but i am not a psychiatrist. Am a neurologist
User:what about if she has histrionic personility because i m not sure which one is it
Doctor:Does she have any friends?
User:not at all she syas she has but she never calls them or inetrcats with them
User:With her it is always never her mistake
Doctor:i see. Well, at this point, i would say that if she threatens to hurt herself when you tell her, you will have to get local law enforcement involved
User:She has not done that. I talked about it with her once and she started screaming at me and blaming me for all our problems.
Doctor:I think you might have to be prepared to leave the home that very evening when you tell her
User:I want to leave home asap but what about if she hs histrionic personality disorder , do u think she will try to harm herself. By the way she is financially totally dependent on me. I pay for all her mother's medical bills and still she is not happy.
Doctor:I understand. There are two way to think about this
Doctor:1 is that the current situation isn't good for either of you
Doctor:2. the current situation will never allow her to seek help
Doctor:if she is histrionic and threatens, please inform her family and friends, and/or the local law enforcement
User:The problem is that we leave abroad and there is no one here from her family
User:sorry i mean live
Doctor:Hmm, ok
User:she has not threatened till now
Doctor:Is there any way to get back to your home country to talk to her about this?
User:That is another problem I am american working in the middle east and she is Ukrainian. o we both are away from our home.
User:Now she wants me to go to a lawyer and write to her a paper that i will not divroce here.
Doctor:At this point i think you need to worry about yourself first, then inform her family f what is going on after you tell her your desire for divorce
User:I have left home before but she did not do anything.
Doctor:So, if it were me, I would leave. Tell her and then tell her parents that i have left so they are aware of her whereabouts.
User:I mean anything crazy
Doctor:Again, if she threatens you or herself, get the authorities involved
Doctor:Given what i know about the middle east, they will probably ask her to return to her home country
User:the only thing she did when i left is that she went to my work and started badmouthing me. I felt so embarrassed
User:She also lied at work that i beat her which i did not
Doctor:I feel for you. I wish i had some way to tell you how to manage her issue
Doctor:but i think you need to protect yourself first
User:Thanks doctor that is also what my parents and frineds are telling me
User:She is good looking and i hv told her that you can find another man and i will keep supporting you financially
Doctor:I cannot imagine what kind of pressure you are under at this time
Doctor:I do not believe you should make any promises to her at this point.
User:The strange thing is that one day she is this wonderful XXXXXXX and then suddenly and the next day for no reason she becomes this angry person who is full of hate
Doctor:You need to understand your own motivations before you do anything
User:sorry i did not understand what you mean by own motivations
Doctor:What i mean is that, before you do anything, you have to be sure of why you want to leave
User:I understand i know that i dont want to be with here because the anger part is much more than the sweet part the time is up thanks dr for your help
Doctor:Take Care!
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