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Situational anorgasmia - Online Doctor Chats

Date : 21-Feb-2012
User rating for this question
Average Posted in: Men's Health
Answered by

General & Family Physician
Practicing since : 2005
Answered : 2408 Questions
User :   My husband and I have been married for a little over a year now and we are eachother's first. We have come to a roadblock, he has little to no sensation in his penis when we are intemate. He has no problem getting an erection and he can masturbate himself but can't seem to climax with me. He has been to his doctor and to a ureologist. The ureologist didn't seem to think that it was a problem that it was in his head and all he needed do was get in the mood. Couldn't find anything physically wrong and I do think (some of it is) psycological (now) but we really want to have kids and I don't know where to go from here. He thinks that his penis is too small and I think that it is me! He doesn't even enjoy it and that makes me sad.
Doctor :   Hi
Doctor :   I am
Doctor :   Let me read the query
Doctor :   and give me a couple of minutes
User :   Ignore my bad spelling
Doctor :   This is a pure feeling of Situational Anorgasmia
Doctor :   This is entirely Psychological
User :   So what do I do? How do we change this?
Doctor :   the Psychological case goes on its own but takes time
Doctor :   I prefer a communication therapy between you
Doctor :   and if it does not help then an expert help of a counsellor
User :   My husband doesn't know that I am even talking to you about this
Doctor :   I completely understand that
Doctor :   You just have to increase his confidence
Doctor :   and if required abstain from sex for a week or two intentionally just to boost his confidence levels
Doctor :   Say that he is great
Doctor :   and he is the one whom you wanted all your life
Doctor :   and he performing great
Doctor :   Eulogy works
Doctor :   Help him get the best erection then only participate in vaginal intercourse
Doctor :   Otherwise you can stimulate him without intercourse
Doctor :   remember, the hardness is directly proportional to stimulation
User :   Well that sounds great but we don't do anything for a couple of months at a time because he doesn't enjoy it and I don't want to push the issue as much as I want it. I don't want to make him do something he doesn't want too.
Doctor :   let him enjoy that hardness, then let his confidence flow out
Doctor :   If Urologist has ruled out any organic reasons then all is within how you can counsel him
Doctor :   If necessary you can go alone to Psychologist to get some tips without hurting your husband
Doctor :   *you alone can go to
User :   The Urologist basically just laughed at him and said this was a good problem to have
Doctor :   Was it for fun?
User :   absolutely not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
User :   I said that we want kids
Doctor :   As you say to me that Urologist had not seen any problem after examining him
User :   We want a better sex life
Doctor :   it is only psychological
Doctor :   When it is psychological, then counselling helps
Doctor :   be it you or a counsellor
Doctor :   It seems you moved out
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