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Over possessiveness of spouse leading to marital tensions - Online Doctor Chats

Date : 21-Feb-2012
User rating for this question
Good Posted in: Anxiety and Stress
Answered by

General & Family Physician
Practicing since : 2005
Answered : 2584 Questions
User :   hi my boy friend is 22 yrs old and latly has shown some bizzare behaviour we rescently had a child togeather 7 months ago and we usually get a baby sitter to go out one night a weekend we usually go out seperatly to see our own friends but in the last month or so he wants to come with me to see my friends and when i push him to go see his friends he starts ranting that i dont want him around that im cheating on him and up to things i shouldnt be taking drugs or something (which i dont do any of ). we recently found out his father is going to prison for six months so we wont have a baby sitter i suggested we take it in turns of going out and staying home with our son so we still get some free time he is totally against the idea he told me that when i go out with out him his heart beats so fast that it hurts and he cant stop thinking about me and what i might be doing its ruining our relation ship he never gos any where but to see his mum dad or brother and its doing my head in he hates crowded places he reckons every one is talking about him any ideas please
Doctor :   Hi
Doctor :   Dr XXX here
User :   hi
Doctor :   Let me read what you have typed.
User :   sorry its so long
Doctor :   Since when is he having this issue?
User :   about 2 wekks its been really bad but ever since the baby came he does not like me going any wheree
Doctor :   Did you talk to him regarding this that why there are changes in his behaviour?
User :   i ask him what the problem is he does not like to talk he just gets angry i want to get him to see a doctor and a couple of times after we have fought he has admitted that its wrong and he needs help
Doctor :   Is he under any kind of stress or is something worrying him?
User :   he lost his job last year that was probably when it started but i was pregnant then so i was always at home any way
User :   its really worrying me he can get quite violent
User :   '
Doctor :   I think he is overpossessive about you and needs your attention everytime.
Doctor :   You need to talk to him and explain him that you are always with him mentally and emotionally
User :   yes i agree and i have many times im really at the point i could leave him and it would make my life easier but i love him and i just need him to sort himself out and go back to having time apart
Doctor :   Try to support him under any circumstances so that he feels that you are always with him.
User :   so you dont think his paranoid ??
Doctor :   Not really
User :   well thats comforting thank you
Doctor :   You can take him to a Counsellor or Psychotherapist and let him talk to him and evaluate him
User :   thanks i will
User :   thanks again
Doctor :   Since he will be face to face it would be more helpful
Doctor :   Thanks
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