you seem to have an introvert personality. you also seem to bevery sensitive about what other people think of you. It also seem that you find a it difficult to take any critcisms or even simple negetive comment about you. the situation further getting complicated by the habituation of always sharing everthing only with your mother. It seems that you have build a world for youself with barriers difficult to break. first start trusting people and share simple unsensitve things with them without bothering about whether they will make it public. Just try to ignore criticisms and negetive ideas and if you find it difficult tryto evaluvate it to find out whether there is aome truth in it which needs to be rectified if so take measure to do it.
Your lack of memory is just that you are too preoccupied with the thoughts about your inabilties which is crrating a lot of stress
Hoewever the easiest and best thing for you is to meet a clinical psychologist
at the earliest for proper evaluation of your problems and getting effective remedies