I've been having what I call episodes where I become a person incapable of functioning like I normally would. They usually last from 7 to 14 days. The most frustrating thing for me is the feeling that I'm high on some drug, or like I'm not really here. It's extremely hard for me to talk, people have told me that I talk slow and soft. It's a great effort for me to move, but I am still able to. I also noticed that I become numb all over. For example: one time I was outside and an ant was biting my foot, I felt something, but it didn't hurt, and I didn't care. It's hard for me to smell and taste anything. If it weren't for my boyfriend I probably would eat. I stop taking care of myself, etc. brushing my teeth, hair, shower. I get dehydrated. I can still think, I know what's going on, but it's almost as if I'm dreaming and can't wake myself up. I've gone to countless doctors and they have all been stumped. I've been to psychiatrist after psychiatrist and all have different opinions. Once I had psychosis, then I had bipolar, then borderline personality, and the one I believed was the major depressive disorder. The episodes actually began after I smoked cannabis one night, but have been laced with methamphetamine. I noticed something wrong because I've smoked pot before and I knew it was never this intense and it never lasted this long. The first time lasted about 2 weeks. A month later it happened again, only that this time I never took anything. After that it kept happening, usually with a couple of months in between, but I can never tell when. I thought I had figured out a pattern, but after this time I'm starting to wonder if my brain has figured out a way to get the same exact experience I did that night without the help of any elicit drug. I know for a fact that my therapist or doctor have any clue on what's going on because they always ask me if I had been drinking or something. I'm worried that somehow, one day, I won't come back from that episode. Please help me or help me find someone who knows where I can get help.