The way you are thinking all seems to be around a basic theme of how the world works, stemming from the childhood experiences. To me this theme appears to be that (I am just guessing here from the description you gave, usually people take few sessions to come to the formulation, so please bear these limitations in mind)
1. I need to please everyone in the world
2. If others are pleased then I am happy
3. I am happy only if I can please others
4. I CAN NOT DO THINGS RIGHT
5. I will be failing others (more than myself) if I don't keep looking for things that will cause me to fail
and so on and so forth
I guess that you may be perfectionistic in nature.
This is not to blame you. This is how you know the world from childhood and that's how you have managed to survive in the world and that's how your brain is now hardwired.
But, since this is not a too good way of dealing with others, it is hurting/distressing you. The best way to deal with this is to try and change how your brain is programmed/hardwired regarding others, world, future and yourself and then ingrain helpful ways of thinking instead of these unhelpful (to you) ways of thinking
Talking therapies will be the most suitable ones to give long term solution to this. Cgonitive Behaviour Therapy
(CBT-which deals with your emotions, behaviour, thoughts etc ) and Interpersonal Therapy
(IPT) may be the best kind of therapies.
Hope this helps.