Thanks for choosing health care magic for posting your query.
From the description that you have given it appears that your father is actually having an anxiety disorder like phobia. Anxiety disorders do moderate on taking alcohol but obviously that's not a solution.
Drinking coffee will increase the problem and should avoid it. Its difficult to suggest you the treatment as he doesn't want to see a doctor.
Probably you need to convince him that his behaviour is troublesome for himself and for the others. If he agrees he should visit a psychiatrist
who can treat him in two ways:
1) Exposure and response prevention and graded exposure with systematic desensitization
The other way would be
2) Medications: Paroxetine, venlafaxine
, escitalopram, fluoxetine
. These medications along with clonazepam and propranolol
immediately before the troubled situation can help your father a lot.
Hope I am able to answer your concerns.
If you have any further query, I would be glad to help you.
In future if you wish to contact me directly, you can use the below mentioned link:
Wish you good health,
Dr. Srikanth Reddy M.D.