Dear Welcome to HCM We understand your concerns I went through your details. I suggest you not to worry much. This is just reflux action, of defense mechanism of the mind. You were facing something which could be a problem in the future. The reaction pattern is normal and if you think positive and act positive, this symptom should be cleared within a month or so. If you require more of my help in this aspect, Please post a direct question to me in this website. Make sure that you include every minute details possible. I shall prescribe some psychotherapy techniques which should help you cure your condition further. Hope this answers your query. Available for further clarifications. Good luck.