I really need some help here. I have had a constant/consistent itchy like ache in my upper abdomen for the better part of 2 yrs (+/-) that has been diagnosed as things from I.B.S. to anxiety . I was even told at one point that it is in my head, by about the 3rd different Dr. I was sent to see. After lots of tests, medications , poking and prodding, I still haven t been given a clear answer. I gave up on seeking treatment, because the pain became way easier to deal with than the embarrassment, after my last Dr. suggested we should look into a medication for my head. Basically assuring me that my abdomen pain is a figment of my imagination, and that its actually my mind that hurts. The shame of this has caused me to give up on my health and focus on numbing the pain with alcohol. I know its only making it worse, but it gives me a few moments of relief. I honestly am not an alcoholic, but a person desperate to not be in pain. Even if its short lived. I am terrified that whatever is wrong, can be fixed before its too late, but I can only go to the finest Dr. s that my insurance (county medi-cal) will allow. I even recieve SSD for it, yet I ve never been properly diagnosed. Yet another reason I feel like they think it s in my head. I feel so alone, and stupid because whatever this is, is taking away my ability to function normally. I am so tired and wore out all of the time. It hurts worse somedays than others, but never goes fully away. Im lost, confused and don t know what to do.