Welcome to Healthcare Magic and thanks for your question...
I can understand how difficult and distressing it must be to going through such feelings. From the picture you have given, I think you are definitely in the midst of a depression
. Feeling low, lack of motivation, social withdrawal, negative thoughts, bleak views about the future, feeling worthless and that life is not worth living, etc. are all symptoms of depression. Often, when we are depressed, our thoughts and attitudes can get clouded due to the depression and we don't feel like even seeking help, as everything seems pointless and a mere waste.
It is a positive thing that you have a good insight about your feelings and are able to recognize that you may be going through depression. Now, it is very important to seek help for this, without hesitating or postponing.
I would suggest that you first talk to someone close to you... may be your parents or relatives ...and let them know what you are going through. You will also need professional help from a psychiatrist
who would be able to assess you in detail and treat you appropriately. There are various options available - talking therapies, medication
, etc. and you will be able to come out of this soon.
Wish you all the best.
- Dr. Jonas Sundarakumar