From the description you have given, it appears that your son is having a problem called conduct disorder
, although we need to find out more details before we can make a certain diagnosis. If these things persist, they are bound to increase and later he may land up with antisocial personality disorder
, which then has a bad prognosis. First thing you can do is stop punishing him and never use violence against him. It will simply aggravate the things. You should appreciate, what ever good thing he does, even though you feel it is trivial and is expected from him. Tell him that he will get a reward if he does a group of good things and then reward him appropriately. Its advisable for you to come and stay with the family and spend quality time with your son. There are certain drugs available which will help in modifying his behaviors but then as i said we need to confirm his diagnosis after having a detailed talk with him.
Hope I am able to solve your concerns.
Thanks and have a nice day.