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Suggest Treatment For Separation Anxiety In Children

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Posted on Sat, 4 Jul 2015
Question: Today is the 4th day since my daughter(3yrs) started going to school.

Day 1&2 - I accompanied and dropped her to school myself.
Day 3 - She was picked and dropped in the school bus.
Day 4 - She was crying and reluctant but we still sent her to school in bus. After returning today we found her dress is wet (urinated) and she is frequently urinating (every 20-30 mins) and unable to control (wetting the floor even before going to wash room)

she is very timid and doesn't socialize with anyone easily. I am concerned and confused weather if I should continue sending her to school because it seems like due to change in the environment, she is highly scared and hence this wetting issue. Kindly advise as I don't want her health to be impacted further.
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Answered by Dr. Vaishalee Punj (43 minutes later)
Brief Answer:
School is a must

Detailed Answer:
Hi and thanks for your query.

I can understand your concerns. Your child is going through an important phase in life that is going to school. She is simply having some separation anxiety from being separated from caregivers and just a process in getting accustomed in school that is a new environment for her.

I would suggest the following:

- Take her around the school yourself and introduce her to her teacher, other staff and children. She will be reassured that you are there in the background.
- Do not panic when she is crying or urinating. These spells will reduce in some time. If she cries when mother says bye, then mother should be out of picture while sending the school.
- Dont make going to school a big deal. Show her other kids that they also go to school.
- For one or two days she can go for lesser time but has to go for full time after that. School is a must and should not be missed just because she is crying. She will not be able to make a routine if she misses school. Just like father or mother go to work daily, children go to school daily. Missing school is not to be taken lightly. Make your own self stronger in this case and send her to school anyways.
- Send extra set of pyjamas in her bag
- Make her play with other kids at home and in park and other people's home. She has to learn to make friends as well.

Overall you need to help her become independent and social. By urinating or crying her health will not get affected. It is normal process in some school going children in early days.

Hope it helps.

Dr Vaishalee
Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Vaishalee Punj
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Answered by
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Dr. Vaishalee Punj

General & Family Physician

Practicing since :2003

Answered : 3256 Questions

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Suggest Treatment For Separation Anxiety In Children

Brief Answer: School is a must Detailed Answer: Hi and thanks for your query. I can understand your concerns. Your child is going through an important phase in life that is going to school. She is simply having some separation anxiety from being separated from caregivers and just a process in getting accustomed in school that is a new environment for her. I would suggest the following: - Take her around the school yourself and introduce her to her teacher, other staff and children. She will be reassured that you are there in the background. - Do not panic when she is crying or urinating. These spells will reduce in some time. If she cries when mother says bye, then mother should be out of picture while sending the school. - Dont make going to school a big deal. Show her other kids that they also go to school. - For one or two days she can go for lesser time but has to go for full time after that. School is a must and should not be missed just because she is crying. She will not be able to make a routine if she misses school. Just like father or mother go to work daily, children go to school daily. Missing school is not to be taken lightly. Make your own self stronger in this case and send her to school anyways. - Send extra set of pyjamas in her bag - Make her play with other kids at home and in park and other people's home. She has to learn to make friends as well. Overall you need to help her become independent and social. By urinating or crying her health will not get affected. It is normal process in some school going children in early days. Hope it helps. Dr Vaishalee