Brief Answer:
Further details please.

Detailed Answer:
Hi XXXX,
Thanks for writing in to us.

I have read through your query in detail.

I understand your boyfriend has ejaculated normally inside you on earlier occasions and presently he is having problems in ejaculating when having sex. However, he does not face the same problem when masturbating.

1. Please let me know his age and since when is he having this problem?
2. It it happening all the time while he is having vaginal sex with you or once in a while?
3. When was the last time he was able to cum inside you?
4. Does he suffer form any medical diseases like diabetes or is he taking any medicines?
5. What do you mean exactly by feeling hard to cum now? is he taking too long or it never happens when in the vagina?
6. Is he getting proper erections?

Waiting for updates from your end.

Take care.
Dr.A.Rao Kavoor

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Brief Answer:
The cause is most likely psychological.

Detailed Answer:
Hi,

Thanks for writing back,

Since he is specifying a cause of something rubbing against him after penetration, you could get yourself evaluated by a gynecologist to rule out any slow-growing painless mass inside first. Once that is ruled out, if he does not ejaculate only on penetration there is a high possibility of the problem being psychological rather than anything physical. There could be many causes of the same like a performance anxiety, fear of failure, partner demands, discord in the relationship, fear of emotional intimacy, restricted foreplay, depression or anxiety etc. If there is a specific cause then it needs to be addressed. Once they are ruled out, if it still persists what you can try doing is taking it slow for now to avoid a repeated sense of failure in him. Repeating the same sequence of events would only confirm the anticipation of failure he might have before starting each time. Try and enhance arousal by stimulation either by you or him (with whatever he is comfortable). He needs to then focus his attention on the sensations he experiences. First let the ejaculations occur without penetration. Going slow in a step wise manner will ease the anxiety. Next let the ejaculations occur near the site of penetration. After this, you may then try penetration –only just before he ejaculates with vigorous thrusting. This needs to be spaced over a few weeks at least, since 7 months of persisting problem will not disappear in a day or two. Also, male superior position is recommended for this problem as it facilitates ejaculation.

I hope this helps,
Dr. A Rao Kavoor

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