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Erectile dysfunction, married. Treatment?

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Practicing since : 2000
Answered : 47 Questions
Hi doctor, I have a sexual problem I would like to discuss. I am 31-year old male and my wife is 25-year old. We have been married for more than 1.5 years but I feel that I suffer from erectile dysfunction kind of problem. I would explain in detail in chat. Thanks.
Posted Sun, 29 Apr 2012 in Erectile Dysfunction
Answered by Dr. Abhijeet Deshmukh, 7 minutes later

Thank you for choosing XXXXXXX for finding your answers. I would be glad to help you with your queries.

Erectile Dysfunction can be caused by excessive anxiety about sexual intercourse, pressure of performing, and self-doubt, when there are no physical illnesses to explain the dysfunction.

If you feel anxiety is your problem, there are ways to deal with it. Please let me know so that we can discuss it further.

Take care.

Abhijeet Deshmukh, MD
Above answer was peer-reviewed by
Follow-up: Erectile dysfunction, married. Treatment? 22 hours later
Hello sir, thanks for your reply. I am not sure anxiety would be the real cause - it can be - but then I am not too much anxious also. Are there any other ways I can prolong or sustain the erection for longer? Please let me know if you require further information.
Answered by Dr. Abhijeet Deshmukh, 17 minutes later
Hello again.

That was just my hypothesis based on your history given above. There are various ways you can prolong the erection, but we need to know if you have tried anything before. Your initial query did not mention if you have difficulty in achieving erection or sustaining it. However, now it seems you have difficulty sustaining the erection for adequate enough time.

Can you explain what efforts have been taken to solve this problem? Have you consulted any doctor for this issue? And have you tried any medicines?

There are a few methods you can try -

1. Regular and XXXXXXX breathing. - This technique allows you to have good erections and sustain it for a longer period of time. It can also prolong the time before you ejaculate. The idea is to take XXXXXXX breath, from the abdomen, during the sexual intercourse. The breathing should not be fast. It should be XXXXXXX and regular and at normal rate. By doing this, your body will get more oxygen, and carbon dioxide will be flushed out. This will help maintain erection for a longer time.

2. Taking a passive position. - Movements of the hip can lead to loss of erection and ejaculation earlier. Hip movements send signals to the brain that the act of sexual intercourse is getting over soon. To tackle this, you can take a passive position by lying on your back. This will minimize your hip movements and help you sustain the erection for a longer time.

3. Sensate Focus. - This is a special technique. With this method, you can retrain your body to get stimulation for sexual excitement. This involves acting like you have met your partner for the first time. A few days should go like you are casual friends, with minimal physical contact. Slowly, you can then start making physical contact such as hugging, etc. Sexual activity has to be avoided. After about two weeks, you can try sexual intercourse again. And this time, a lot of emphasis needs to be given to foreplay. You can read more about Sensate Focus elsewhere.

4. Sildenafil Citrate. - Also known as Viagra, this medicine helps sustain erection for a longer period of time. And it can work for a period of 6-12 hours effectively.

Apart from these common methods, you can do a lot more to improve your relationship with your partner. The emotional attachment and understanding go a long way in making a healthy sexual relationship.

Hope this helps.

Abhijeet Deshmukh, MD
Above answer was peer-reviewed by
Follow-up: Erectile dysfunction, married. Treatment? 25 hours later
Thank you doctor. I will try the suggested tips. So far I have taken some steps to resolve the problem. No I have not consulted doctor yet. And I have not taken medicines also. The steps I took was like watching porn etc but am still trying that. I do not have any difficulty in getting erection - in fact - I get multiple erections also and regular morning erection. Your advice has really helped me mentally at the least.

One thing I wanted to ask is how safe is sildenafil citrate. Is it harmful to health or does it have any side effects? I would like to avoid medicines. Apart from that should I get any medical check-up done?

I guess I may have consumed alloted minutes of my package so am not sure how long we can continue in this discussion. But please respond if you have time. Thanks.
Answered by Dr. Abhijeet Deshmukh, 58 minutes later

Of course, Sildenafil Citrate is just an option you can choose. Your doctor will be able to assess whether there are any medical conditions that might not allow the use of Sildenafil. If you have any heart ailment, you may need to be cautious with the use of Sildenafil. You can consider getting a general evaluation from your physician and basic cardiac investigations such as the ECG, if your physician advises so. These may be sufficient if you do not have any major physical illness.

There is an alternative to Sildenafil available these days. It is called Tadalafil (Tadalis). It is considered to be safer compared to Sildenafil. And Tadalis has a quick onset of action.

It is not necessary that you take these medicines. But you can certainly consider giving it a try. Quite often these medicines help people to regularize their sexual intercourse pattern, and they may not need the medicines later. Please consult your doctor about any of these medicines.

If you can follow the techniques that we discussed in the earlier message, your chances of overcoming the problem are more. Modify your lifestyle to a healthier one, exercise regularly, breath XXXXXXX and regularly during intercourse, take passive position, try the medicine a few times, drink lot of fluids and above all, avoid thinking too much about performance. This appears to be a temporary phase and you will overcome it.

Best Regards

Abhijeet Deshmukh, MD
Above answer was peer-reviewed by
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