Get your Health question answered in 3 easy steps
A Doctor will be with you shortly
Ask a Doctor Now
153 Doctors are Online

Tips for anger management - Online Doctor Chats

Date : 21-Feb-2012
User rating for this question
Average Posted in: Mental Health
Answered by

General & Family Physician
Practicing since : 2005
Answered : 2408 Questions
User :   I have an anger problem. I would like to solve this.
Doctor :   Hi
User :   hi
Doctor :   May I know your age and gender?
User :   26 and male
Doctor :   And can you briefly explain what you meant by anger problem?
User :   I realize that I have an uncontrollable anger problem. I thought I had resolved it in the last 4 years but I see it returning when provoked enough.
User :   I am not sure whether it is normal and hence, I came here for consultation because this website seemed very convenient.
User :   I realized it after I ruined a friendship with a girl who liked me because I got too angry. I abused her verbally and insulted her a lot.
Doctor :   Ok
User :   My anger lasted for 3 days and only after 3 days I realized that I have done a big mistake. I realized that if someone had abused me so badly, I would have also probably never talked to that person again.
Doctor :   Can I know how you respond to your anger?
Doctor :   Apart from this one episode you mentioned.
Doctor :   How do you usually respond when provoked/
Doctor :   And does that happen all the time when provoked?
User :   Usually, I respond by telling the other person that he or she is wrong.
Doctor :   Ok
User :   Actually in the last 4 years nobody has provoked me so much. This new friend I made a few months back could provoke me so much.
User :   I responded with an abusive behavior a few weeks back but on apologizing, she understood. But I did it again and this time I have ruined the friendship. And only because I was not forgiven this time, I realized that this seems like persistent problem.
User :   I respond in this manner only to people very close to me because there I feel that I can do whatever I want and it turns out that I am wrong. I shouldn't be abusive to anyone, no matter what.
User :   I know that anger problem may be a medical issue and that's why I thought I should come here for consultation.
Doctor :   Since you had mentioned that you had similar problems earlier and you had got used to it.
User :   yes. I had a lot of these problems about 4 years back. But gradually, I thought I had resolved it myself.
Doctor :   There are plenty of chances that you can get over your anger problems this time too, by following the same guidelines.
Doctor :   Hence I would like to know the methods you had applied.
Doctor :   I shall add to it if any other measures you may have to include.
User :   But I did not follow any guidelines. I just thought I had resolved it. Perhaps my friends and relatives were very understanding and they realized that I was getting angry and hence calmed me down.
User :   but since this new friend never really calmed me down but wanted to make her point, I kept getting more and more angry until I started abusing her verbally.
Doctor :   Ok
Doctor :   I shall suggest you few methods of anger management.
User :   ok
Doctor :   Before discussing those, you need to understand that it needs plenty of patience and practice before you can master to control your anger.
Doctor :   Patience is the primary virtue if you are going to successfully manage your anger.
User :   yes
User :   i have only one problem. i don't know how to practice. there isn't anyone now who can provoke me so much that i can test whether i am successful.
Doctor :   it does not need some provocation to try this.
User :   ok
Doctor :   You can do these when ever you feel that you are getting angry.
User :   ok
Doctor :   You can know this, if you know, how you respond to a situation of provocation.
User :   ok
Doctor :   Since you have described me those, you now know how you generally act in such a situations.
User :   yes
Doctor :   First thing you need to know that abusing will only make matter more worse and your symptoms more severe.
Doctor :   So its better that you avoid those.
User :   yes
Doctor :   if you feel that you cannot avoid it, then I would suggest you this.
Doctor :   You can write in a piece of paper those abusive words which you intend to speak to the person.
User :   ok
Doctor :   This will make the other person calm down, inturn will not make your anger more.
User :   ok
Doctor :   2. During such occasions you can also make yourself calm by simple exercises, like
Doctor :   deep breatihing exercise or counting your breathe.
User :   ok
Doctor :   This increases the blood circulation to the brain and helps in calming you down.
Doctor :   3. Speak to your friends, you can make a quick call to your friends and family if they are not here with you now.
Doctor :   Explain to them about what you feel.
User :   ok
Doctor :   A soft words from them will make you feel relax.
User :   ok
Doctor :   4. Physical exercises and yoga.
User :   ok
Doctor :   They intend to have good affects in stabilising once mood and behaviour.
Doctor :   You can start with those.
User :   ok
Doctor :   These are the few measures that can be applied.
User :   ok
Doctor :   If these few measures are not helping you then the lastly
Doctor :   you can make your self calm down other exercises like punching pillows, punching games on a computer.
User :   ok
Doctor :   All these measures are few ways of managing anger.
User :   ok
Doctor :   You can follow the best method which is suitable to you.
User :   yes
Doctor :   Lastly, since anger is part of human nature, its not a mental condition or disease.
Doctor :   You will get over it by following simple measures such as one of those.
User :   ok
Doctor :   There are many books and literatures available in anger management, you can read those.
Doctor :   And before, we end this discussion, one small advice. You can take it or leave it.
User :   yes
Doctor :   Feel sorry, if you have hurt others.
Doctor :   A simple sorry can make wonders.
User :   yes, I do feel sorry and I regret it a lot.
Doctor :   So do not feel ashamed in saying a sorry, if you end up with abusing others again.
Doctor :   Have you followed what I have suggested?
User :   yes, i am not. i have apologized for my behavior sincerely. yes, I have followed your suggestions. thanks.
User :   could I please know your name? the chat doesn't show your name.
Doctor :   I am Dr XXX
Doctor :   Thanks for consulting me.
User :   ok
Doctor :   Bye for now.
User :   thanks. bye.
Question is related to
Medical Topics
© Ebix, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
All the information, content and live chat provided on the site is intended to be for informational purposes only, and not a substitute for professional or medical advice. You should always speak with your doctor before you follow anything that you read on this website. Any health question asked on this site will be visible to the people who browse this site. Hence, the user assumes the responsibility not to divulge any personally identifiable information in the question. Use of this site is subject to our Terms & Conditions
Already Rated.
Your rating:

Ask a Doctor