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Losing interest in sex - Online Doctor Chats

Date : 21-Feb-2012
User rating for this question
Very Good Posted in: Sexual Problems
Answered by

General & Family Physician
Practicing since : 2005
Answered : 2345 Questions
User :   Hi, my 20 year old husband claims to be losing his sex drive. What could the problem be?
Doctor :   HI
User :   hi
Doctor :   Since when have you noticed it or since when is he complaining of this problem?
User :   i started noticing for the past month or so...
Doctor :   Do you mean he is not engaging in sexual activity or he has issues with erection?
User :   not engaging
Doctor :   Have you noticed any problems during sexual intercourse?
User :   he loses interest faster...usually he wants to keep going for a while but recently its been pretty quick.
Doctor :   Do you mean he is losing erection or is he ejaculation early?
User :   early, and then he's pretty much done.
User :   he still has an erection and will keep going if i ask, but the interest isnt there anymore. but its getting him in bed thats the problem lately.
Doctor :   Ok
User :   i've given him plenty of hints and opertunity but he just isnt up for it lately.
Doctor :   Does he have any medical illness such as recent infection, diabetes>
User :   no
Doctor :   Does he smoke or consume alcohol?
User :   nope
Doctor :   Does he use illicit drugs?
User :   nope
User :   we dont even curse...
User :   we have a 6 month old
Doctor :   Do you find he has reduce body hair, facial hair?
User :   and we have been under stress lately. no reduce in hair.
Doctor :   Ok
Doctor :   Let me explain to you.
User :   i wonder if he might be depressed...
Doctor :   Reduced / loss of libido is caused by multiple factors.
Doctor :   Most common causes in young man are psychological ones.
Doctor :   Mental stress, anxiety with regards to performance, fear of infection, anxiety and depressions are few of those conditions/factors that affect the libido almost instantly.
Doctor :   From your description, it sound that mental stress and depressive thoughts could be the factors causing the reduce libido.
User :   how can i help?
Doctor :   Apart from these factors, reduced physical energy levels, low nutrition. a recent infection can factors that may be responsible too.
Doctor :   The best way of solving this issue is by communication.
Doctor :   I suggest that you do not force him.
Doctor :   Speak to him as to what the problem is.
Doctor :   Involve in building a stronger emotional bonding
User :   its stressing me out also. he got laid off a year ago and we are staying at his parents. and i have tried talking, but he has a hard time with that. he is not good with putting words to his thoughts.
Doctor :   which can only be achieved with your support.
Doctor :   Try going out to places, restaurants, movie and other cultural meets.
Doctor :   Involve in non sexual talks.
Doctor :   Discuss regarding family and work rather than sexual talks.
Doctor :   This will slowly help in gaining confidence.
Doctor :   You can then progress to the next level,
Doctor :   that is physical stimulation( not sexual intercourse)
Doctor :   such as touching and kissing.
User :   we dont have alot of friends to begin with because of our life style. most kids our age havent been married for three years and have a child. we talk everyday, about lots of things.
Doctor :   A small and minor changes can slowly bring him back to normal as regards to sexual functions.
Doctor :   if you find that mental stress and depression is showing up in his other daily activities, then consulting a psychologist for counseling sessions is also worth.
Doctor :   In the mean time, consider getting his blood sugars and thyroid hormone checked too.
User :   thanks. i'll give your advice a try. i hope it helps.
Doctor :   Thyroid and blood sugar alterations can also affect libido as well as be the cause of depression.
Doctor :   Have you followed what I have suggested?
User :   you've got it. i have. i will check all you said.
Doctor :   Do you have any other query?
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